Friday, October 7, 2011


Ive been feeling sad lately... *sigh* Mattie I completely understand. I've been having low self esteem too, but with my face, and nose... :( Its so dumb, we are beautiful, and we shouldn't be having low self esteem, but some times this world I feel just brings us down because they have this dumb standard of whats beautiful or thin or what not. ugh. Mattie, you are beautiful, and will be the best Sailormoon ever. You dont have to be a stick to be a great sailormoon cosplay. ;_; I love ya, and Im praying for you.

Ive been feeling really weighed down lately... just like to much stimulation from everything around me. I feel restless, and im starting to just feel stressed out again with convention stuff... I feel I have nothing art wise to sell... two drawings, thats it. Im so mad at myself I had so much time to work on stuff but I procrastinated, now here it is, 5 weeks away. Im going to try and get stuff done before then, but it probably realistically wont me more then 1 or 2 drawings. :( sigh... and sometimes its just not fair, there is a girl in my 3D animation class and she draws sooo good! She just whips stuff up even right in class! Its insane... it seems like she doesn't even have to try, it comes natural. I know I have to fight for what I want, and I will. I may not have natural talent but I'm going to get there by working hard. >:(

Any way... sorry for all the negativity. On a happier note I had an amazing God moment today. :) So many times that Ive tried to talk to people about God, I didn't think or know if I was even making a difference or helping them. But today at work, one girl that I had talked to a while back, came up to me and told me she has been doing a bible study, and that today during work, she was getting stressed, and was needing patience to deal with one of the kids, and said she said a prayer and that it was amazing! Then she gave me a hug! I was soooo happy to hear that! It was just, wow, one of those amazing God moments, like God was telling me, that I am planting seeds, even if it doesn't seem like it some times. ^^

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